Tuesday, September 15, 2015

To The Guys Who Open Doors For Me

 To the guys who open doors for me,

 Thank you.

 It is appreciated.

 It is sweet.

 It makes me feel honored, cherished, and loved as a woman to see that the men in my life  are looking out for me in this way.

  But if you have been chided, yelled at, or glared at by other women you have opened doors for in the past, I just want you to know that I am sorry.

 I am sorry for the women who don't understand that you were sacrificially loving them, perhaps a stranger, by putting their needs before yours and letting them walk in ahead of you.

 In a marriage relationship, the man is supposed to be a picture of Christ sacrificially loving his bride the church. Husbands are to love their wives sacrificially as Christ laid down His life for us. Ephesians 5:25 says, "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."

 I believe opening doors for women is just one simple way that young men can practice loving their future wives.

 I also believe that opening doors for women is a simple way for all men to show love and courtesy to all women.

 By opening doors for us, you are not telling us we are inferior. Instead you are saying that we are more important than you. You are putting our needs above your own like Jesus did on the cross. Like Jesus calls every man to do in some aspect.

 Some women want their husband's leadership for themselves. They don't want to be "inferior" or underneath the headship of their husbands. But they are forgetting that the best leaders lead sacrificially. That good leaders put those they are leading first. When the husband's' leadership role is described in that way, I am honestly glad to be a woman- among the first to be protected, the first in the life boats.

 Though I think it is true that some men unfortunately hold wrong and demeaning opinions of women and only see us as inferior objects, why should we assume that is every man's agenda?

 Yes we are capable of opening doors for ourselves.

 Of course we can be strong.

 But our guys need to be men and we need to let them be men.

So to the guy in my class who shared about the anger he received from a woman he opened the door for, I want to tell you to keep opening doors for us. Keep doing it even when some of us complain. I will be among those who will look you in the eye and genuinely thank you.


  1. Good words here Allison! I try to make a point of thanking guys when they open doors. It's interesting that you pointed out it's a way for them to put the needs of others above themselves. :)

    1. Thanks, Paige. I have also always made sure I thanked guys for opening doors for me. And after hearing about what the guy in my class went through it has become even more important to me than before.

  2. I think it's polite and courteous for any person (man or woman) to open doors for others. Nice post<3

  3. Nice post Allison! I heard a similar story from someone I knew and felt exactly as you described in this post. Same as you, I believe it is important for women to recognize when a man is acting out of kindness and to encourage them to act in a gentlemanly manner. When men show respect to women it is not a reflection of our weakness, but rather a reflection of their heart to put others first. Many thanks to every guy out there who has held open a door for me or acted as a gentleman in some other way...it means a lot to some of us!